The Essence Of Who I Am

Someone in my family died today.

They were the peace and love. 

They were the hugs and kind words.

They were so comforting and happy.

It was a long cancerous process and I said goodbye so many times.

And sometimes I thought that it would be better if they were just gone to be put out of thier misery. 

But at the end of the day I never wanted them to leave.

And every morning I woke up and made sure they were ok.  

Then unexpectedly they were gone. 

And those 6 years of waiting still wasn’t long enough. 

I cried and then screamed and held their hand and told them I needed them to come back. 

I told them I couldn’t make it without them. 

I felt more pain than i ever thought possible

People told me it happened all the time

And Whisked the body away 

It was normal 

I should just accept it

Move on

But There was no funeral

No one else cried

No one sent flowers

No one asked if i was ok

No one grieved except me

And my brother and sister

It’s been 3 years now and i’m still waiting for the pain to go away

I’m waiting for it to be normal 

I’m waiting to accept it

I’m waiting to move on

M.A.P

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