The Essence Of Who I Am

I wish I could give you all of me
Like I used to
Willingly
Beautifully
Now I dont think I have all of me left
Its on hold
Taken
Like an old library book that is about to fray
Will you still love me
I know you will
I’m sorry I respond to his crys before yours
His are apart of me
He has taken a peice out of me
By surgery
Removed physically
Hauntingly
I cry with him
And then for you
You were not replaced
I was
You are not forgotten
I just care too deeply
He’s so helpless
And I love how strong you are
And I love how weak I can make you
You are his protecter
Running to the store at 8pm when I wish I could just come with you
But I am trapped beneath him
Itching to stretch
To run
To walk
To breathe
But I am too worried about his breath
My throat is dry and sore but I cant feel the pain
only his
Nipples chapped from the constant feeding
Sleep deprivation is trying to yank at me
Snap at me
Snaps at you
You stand there willingly
Ready to take it
And I feel how abandoned you feel
And it breaks me
You are stronger then me
Not abandoned just a stepping stone for life
A smile that makes my day
A hug that a crave
A kiss that is even more special
Because of its rarity
A bond that will just go stronger

M.A.P

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